Archive | Funny Coffee Girl

The D-Team

leatherheads

I remember that rush I got, standing on the podium in the 1990 Olympics as they placed the gold medal around my neck. I remember the sense of accomplishment I felt, knowing I’d done my country proud. And the applause! Oh, the applause was amazing, ringing in my ears, getting louder and louder . . […]

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Orange . . . the new black?

orange prison outfit

It’s a good thing I’m a law-abiding citizen. Well, other than an occasional infraction of our traffic laws, I’m a law-abiding citizen. But my rare (okay, not so rare) speeding ticket is usually the result of absent-mindedness, not defiance. Most people shouldn’t drink and drive. I shouldn’t think and drive. My point is, I wouldn’t […]

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Funny Anything-but-Coffee Girl: Guest post by Charis Brumbaugh

renaecharismonkey

Note to readers: My daughter recently asked if she could write one of my articles for me. I told her sure! She could have a go at it. I thought she was kidding. Less than an hour later, she handed me the following article. I’m sure after reading it, you’ll understand why I loved it […]

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Bricked In

brick mason woman

After nearly % decades on this earth, I’ve finally found my calling in life. I’m going to be a brick mason.         Last week, Superman and I put in a new patio. I did it alone, really. But Superman wanted to help so much that I found a few minor jobs he could do, just […]

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Bonnie and Clyde

BonnieAndClyde2013_DVD

Superman and I nearly went to the pokey this week. It all started innocently enough. We decided several months ago to spend our vacation in the beautiful New Mexico mountains. Friends of ours just happen to own some vacation rental property in Ruidoso, and we spent a couple of days hiking and sightseeing in Cloudcroft. […]

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Cleopatra was ugly . . .

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Working Out

ID-10035243

I don’t like to exercise. I don’t like anything about it. Believe me, I’ve tried. I’ve tried walking. I’ve tried jogging. I’ve tried Zumba and tennis and swimming and weightlifting. I’ve tried it with friends and alone, with the cute workout clothes and without (without cute clothes . . . uh . . . not […]

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The Breaking Point

Asparagus

I come from a long line of excellent cooks. Gifted, southern women who know how to make flaky dinner rolls from scratch, who know how to make chocolate pie with up-to-there meringue, who can create heavenly kitchen scents which will bring even the manliest soldier to his knees. That is my heritage. I am the […]

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Beauty College

foil wraps

I woke up today and knew it was time. Actually, I woke up two weeks ago and knew it was time, but since procrastination is one of my spiritual gifts, I put it off until today, when I couldn’t find any more excuses. I had to get my hair done. Yes, that’s right. What is, […]

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Chicken Poo

ChickenEggs

My hens are laying. And I have to tell you, home-grown eggs taste way better than store-bought eggs. But store-bought has its advantages, too, as I learned this past week. When I discovered my girls were putting out, I was thrilled. Each day, I went and gathered the three or four eggs I saw in […]

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