Author Archive | Funny Coffee Girl

Those Smelly Dogs

I don’t like dogs. Now, before all you animal lovers out there start pitching a fit, please hear me out. We own two dogs – Annie (Shitzu) and Shamgar (Lhassa). They live in our house, much to my chagrin. But, my husband is a dog lover. My children are dog lovers. And so, I put […]

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Bottoming Out

I am a child of the eighties. Yes, I proudly wore the football-sized shoulder pads in my bold-print silk dresses. I had big, curly, teased-out-to-there hair, which I often wore in a pony-tail on the side of my head. I owned legwarmers. I carried a comb in the back pocket of my Gloria Vanderbilt jeans. […]

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Soar Like Eagles

Have you ever seen a real, live bald eagle? I have. Last week, my parents took the kids and me over to see the bald eagle’s nest in Llano County. And it was a sight to behold. The nest itself was enormous! It rested in a bare-branched tree, and took up the better part of […]

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Facing the Giants

Don’t you just love it when the underdog becomes the top dog? I do. It gives me hope. Because honestly, many days I feel more like the underdog. Last year, the New York Giants didn’t have a good year. As a matter of fact, their head coach, Tom Coughlin, was nearly fired! He was having […]

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What I Want for my Birthday

My birthday is coming up. As a matter of fact, by the time you read this, I will have kissed one decade goodbye and said hello to a new one. But no worries. Birthdays don’t really bother me. Hey, considering the alternative, I’d say a birthday really is a cause for celebration! My daughter has […]

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Cleopatra was Ugly

Experts at Newcastle University have studied a coin from 32 B.C., which on one side bears the image of Cleopatra, and on the other side, Marc Antony. These experts weren’t studying the coins for any real historical significance. Rather, it seems they just wanted to rate these two historical greats on a scale of one […]

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Letting Go

My closet is beautiful. It is clean, organized, and perfect. The floors of my closet are vacuumed. My shoes rest neatly in shoe pockets. My purses are lined up in pristine rows. If I had a laptop, I would be sitting in there to write this article. Unfortunately, my bedroom/office floor now contains all the […]

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Peanuts to Diamonds

Did you know that peanuts can be turned into diamonds? It’s true! Scientists have now discovered a technique that harnesses pressures that are even higher than those found at the earth’s core. They are using this technique to turn unlikely substances, including peanut butter, into diamonds! Professor Malcom McMahon, of the Center for Science and […]

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Recovering Holiday-holic

In the last few years, I have made an about face when it comes to Christmas. Once upon a time, Christmas was my absolute, hands-down favorite time of year. And my absolute, hands-down favorite place to be at Christmas time? The mall. Any mall would do. I relished the decorations, the music, the crowds, the […]

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The Trophy Buck

My husband, Rick, is quite proud of all the dead animals hanging on the walls of his study. He is an avid hunter, and during this time of year, he seems to eat, sleep, and breathe hunting. He was rather surprised the other day when I pointed out to him that I, too, am gearing […]

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